Nostalgia

I think the best thing in the world is nostalgia.

I actually started this post a week ago, and I remember when I wrote that first sentence. You know how I feel about it right now?

Another week later. Like it's the best thing in the world!

I like to remember what being a kid was like. During the summer, it was about running to the ice cream truck and laughing at the diabetic kid drinking his warm sugar-free raspberry lemonade. During the winter it was all about hanging out with your buddy Hans and skiing in Kitzbühel while momma made some schnitzel. For some reason we've been having a lot of Austrian readers, so that was a geographic shout-out....I have no idea what schnitzel is, or how to pronounce that town...But I actually did hang out with Hans.

But I digress, for the reason for the blog is the ultimate of nostalgia. The topic that makes any individual of our generation zone out as they reminisce. Old Nickelodeon shows.

So, lets discuss.

Fourth grade through sixth grade, I had my TV bloc ritual, it consisted of two shows. The first was Xena: Warrior Princess...for obvious reasons. The second show was The Secret World of Alex Mack. Dumped with a vat of toxic stuff, as is always the case, she now has superhero powers including telekinesis, shooting electricity, and turning into a puddle (not sure what that one was all about). And you know what she does with them? She goes to middle school... Seems like a waste. If I had those powers, I would totally kick some ass. And you know who taught me that? Xena.

Doug....Oh what a magnificent show, and was totally about me. There was a high school crush, there were bullies (who were also green at my school), there was a dog who got cable, and I also have a best friend who honks when you grab his nose. My superhero alter-ego was more of a boxer briefs kind of guy, but to each his own. I was such a huge fan, I got a new cell phone for the sole purpose of getting that theme song as a ringtone. Do da do da do do do da do do do Bpit-a-Bpit-a-Bpit-aaaaah. You don't want to know how long I tried to work that out.

And now lets start talking about the game shows. Every kid who has ever seen Legends of the Hidden Temple wanted to be on that show, as long as we weren't a Purple Parrot. Gotta be a Green Monkey. The thing adults didn't understand was this: we didn't watch it for entertainment, we were researching. We had schematics and room plans of that Hidden Temple. And I know if I was ever climbing through that maze, and a Temple Guard came out, I'd punch him in the nuts and keep on going. No, you can't have half a coin! I have to find the Undershorts of Ghengis Khan!

GUTs was a pretty awesome show too. That was the one where they brought kids from all over the world to play a kid version of American Gladiator Every contestant had his own little biography thing too. Every kid not from America said he played soccer. Every American kid said he liked video games. I wonder who would win? No way our fat asses could get up the Agro Crag when Esteban has been hurdling up the Pyrenees since he was four years old.

But the undeniable best show Nickelodeon has ever made was Rugrats. There's Phil and Lil, the sexually confused duo. There was Chuckie, whose Jew stereotype was too much even for me (I think the Austrians probably laughed about it though). And there was Tommy, who was awesome regardless of the fact that his giant head probably should have killed Mrs. Pickles. I was watching that show religiously even after they started making the dumb episodes where they were "all grown-up"...but the grown-up versions were in middle school.....which means they were still younger than me...dammit.

Now there were a few shows on Nickelodeon, although I hate to say it, that I positively disliked. Nobody who is fond of their IQ should ever watch these shows: Ren and Stimpy & Rocko's Modern Life. No. Just no. My girlfriend says she liked those shows, and it makes me think I should try single life again.

Everybody has their own favorites, and there's only so much of your time I can use up talking about bygone awesomeness. Most of you can get HBO and probably feel like you're too old for such tom-foolery as Nickelodeon re-runs. But as you stay up til 2:30 in the morning for that one boob shot on HBO2, take a moment and let nostalgia take over. Best thing in the world....until the boob shot, I mean.

Byah!
Rob